That being said--EAT MORE?! I'm scared to do it!! Seriously!!
I looked more into the eating clean movement that Priscilla mentioned in her comment. The blog she recommended had a calorie calculator on there that said I should be eating like 3000 calories a day!!! I don't think that would be wise. I did order multiple books on clean eating so that I can have a guide and make sure I am doing it "right." I think I already do, but a little motivation, help and recipe ideas can't hurt! Plus, I ordered one on clean eating for kids which I am really excited about. I have a hard time knowing what snacks to feed them. If you will remember I tried making my own crackers--tasty but TIME CONSUMING!!!
Then I was just talking to my sister about my issues and she told me about a blog post from hungry runner girl about disordered eating. Okay, that spoke to me!!! Just this part alone is so ME:
I highly, highly recommend reading the whole post!!! (Or maybe you all have already read it and I am just extremely late to the party!) I have so much to think about and digest! Thank you to all of you who commented and were willing to give thoughts and advice. I need to figure this out and not give up!!